The charred bacon...

Barbecue party!!! My friends sounded very excited planning our group event. As for me, I wasn’t too keen myself. It’s not that I don’t enjoy being with my friends, I love spending time with them. I was rather worried about half cooked meat destroying my stomach. None of my friends are exactly professional cooks and it was going to be our first barbecue.  I am not a health freak either but I have had bad experiences with diarrhea. Not to mention I had to take an exam the next day. So for the next hour or so, everybody was planning for that day and I was listening half heartedly. We decided to reach the friend’s house at five the day of the party and concluded the meeting.

The day of the barbecue arrived. It was a typical monsoon day in Kathmandu. It had rained the night before. There were huge clouds in the sky, the streets were wet and the air was so fresh. During the day, I studied for my exam and went to the college. I finished my work at the college and I came back home early. I was alone at the house and was too bored to study so I took a nap.

I woke up all sweaty and with a severe headache. I had slept nearly two hours and was going to be late for the party if I didn’t hurry up. I freshened up hastily and got ready to go. I went to pick up a friend and some food for the barbecue. We caught up with some of our other friends and went to the party. We were the first ones there. Turned out, others were still shopping. We started talking about our day and the possibility of rain foiling our barbecue. The last of our friends were nowhere to be seen. They were late. Later, we got a call that they had finished shopping and needed help to get everything at the venue. I and a couple

of guys went to pick them up. At last, nearly two hours after we had arrived, we got the fire going.   

Everyone was busy talking to each other sitting around the grill holding a drink. We took our turns to man the grill. I was having fun and had completely forgotten my fear of eating uncooked food. Being there with all my friends was one of the best times I had. I wondered how naïve I was to think only about bad things that could happen to me when we were planning the party. How could I have forgotten what it’s like to be around friends? That experience would always be worth any abdominal distress I may or may not have later.

We had chicken, sausages, chips and tomato chutney. One of the friends exclaimed that he had brought some bacon. Yeah!!! We all cheered in unison.

None of us were expert in either cooking or controlling the heat in the grill but we all were experts in being friends. Talking to each other, having a laugh, sharing our experiences, that was our thing and that’s what will always be in my memory. Not to mention, the mouth watering charred bacon….. 

  

Flower photography...

Earth laughs in flowers.

                              - Ralph Waldo Emerson

I like taking photographs. 

This is my collection of flowers.

Most of the pictures here are of my home. 

The above one is a cotton plant. 

 I don't even know what most of these flowers are named.

This one is rhododendron. I found during my visit to Pokhara. 

My terrace looks wonderful with all these flowers.

The below one is not a flower.

I am not a professional photographer.

I use my cell phone camera.

The pictures above and below are taken in ICIMOD, Godawari.

I have nothing more to say.

except...

The last picture is from my trek to Gosainkunda.

When the nature decided to move...

(I wrote this piece on May 14,2015)

So, what do you do in a crisis situation? What do you tell yourself to understand the uncertainty of the days? How do you cope with the lingering fear of what the nights hold?

Twenty days and counting but the dark day is still fresh in the memory of the people who experienced it. Anyone who has tried to forget and move on has had their memory jolted by the daily reminder of aftershocks. I myself remember the day clearly when the nature showed how it was still the controlling force in this so-called world of humans...

It was the beginning of an average Saturday morning for me. I wanted to sleep in after a long week of working on my final year project, but the sharp sound of alarm startled me out of my sleep. I had forgotten to turn my alarm off. I heard movement outside my room. My parents had already started their day. In the next hour or so, I tried to go back to sleep but the constant movement and loud conversation did not help my cause. Finally, I kicked my blanket off of me, stood up and gingerly walked towards the bathroom. I am neither a morning person nor am I a very social one so I didn’t utter a single word to anyone until I was fresh and made tea for myself. By that time, my mum and dad were all dressed up and ready to go out. My father works overtime most Saturdays and my mother teaches tailoring to students as a part of extra classes in a school. I was having my breakfast when I remembered I had something I had to attend to. I had to finish a poster presentation and deliver it to my college by 11:00 am in a program for April 25, the DNA day. So, I gathered my notes and laptop and went to my friend’s house to work on the poster.

My friend’s house is just five minutes’ walk from where I live. I reached there and we worked on the presentation for about an hour and a half. We were not satisfied so decided not to go ahead with the poster. After all, we had only finished working on one third of our project and we were not very confident about our poster. So, I came back home feeling dejected and wondering why I was so lazy.

Back at the house, I was watching the preview of football matches of the premier league in England on my television, when my brother came back after a haircut. We started talking about his new hair and how my hair is always messed up. My brother is a follower of latest fashion and compared to him, I am a blob. I had had enough of his self praise, so I shifted the conversation to football. The topic swiftly escalated to how good Liverpool, his favorite club are compared to the team I support, Arsenal. I and my brother like to argue about simple things and our argument often turns mildly violent but in truth, we are as thick as thieves. I guess my brother did not want to go on with our little quarrel for long and said he was going to take a bath.I told him to have lunch first and he agreed.

I passed the TV remote to my brother and stood up to go to the kitchen. I was just out of our living room when I heard a lovely song playing so I went back in to watch it. Mid way through the song, I looked at the clock on the wall to see the time. It was four minutes before twelve and then suddenly it happened.....

       

You...

I am no leader, yet you follow me...
I am no light, yet your eyes glow when you look at me...
You hear no sound, yet you listen so tentatively...
I have nothing, yet you treat me like a king...
You know you should fear me, yet all you do is love...
For everyone else I am a devil,
but you see an angel in me.....

Walk...

I walk down this road...abandoned and dark...
I am walking alone but there is a warm feeling....
I am walking alone but I am being followed by distant eyes....
I am walking alone but there are ears that listen to my each step....
There is no light but I know where I am headed....
I pursue the breeze gently grazing my face....
I follow my heart...to a place...lively and august.....

Savior...

"So, u want to be their savior?", a shrill voice behind me inquired.

I turned back and looked straight into the eyes of a dark, old man. His hair was silver and skin wrinkled. A lean figure perfectly dressed in a white suit. His eyes were cold and hollow. It seemed he was looking through me.

I smiled and replied, "A lost man is no savior and I am merely an echo of my past, moving towards my extinction."

Reflection...

i saw a reflection...not sure if its mine....
its dark, cold and devilish....
what i am sure is that i am not the same person i was....
i have done things i said i would never do....
i have done things that i regret every moment....
i have dwelt into the dark alleys of pain and suffering....
i have messed up things i was perfect at....
my vessel of sins are overflowing....
but there is a wicked smile on my face....
there is a pleasure thinking about all the pain i caused....
my heart is shallow...my mind is corrupt....
i saw a reflection..and i am sure its mine.....

Myself...

Hmm….after a long time I’m ready to write. There is a lovely song playing in the background. Don’t know how much it describes my situation but I sure love this music. Me, I’m just a normal person with some normal needs and dreams. But like everybody else, I am the hero of my story. A confused character, as some might say. I always thought I was different. Watching all the sci-fi movies n cartoons, when I was a child, I would dwell into my own world where I was fighting the bad guys, saving the world and also getting the girl in the end. After all, who wouldn’t want a damsel in distress in their story, for whom you would play with danger and save her life? I need to write the above sentence correctly because it sounds a little wobbly, and it probably makes everyone guess that I’m some kind of a nerd. I don’t know if m a geek, because where I’ve come from we all dress alike and certainly I’ve seen bigger book-worms than me. One thing that I’m certain about is I wear glasses and everybody thinks I’m a study freak because I wear them. Actually, not everybody thinks that. I know a girl who thought that. Let’s not change the topic. I am sitting down on my bed and thinking how I can express my feelings. An airplane passes by making a loud noise. I looked out of my window, but I’m late. The plane has already landed but then I can see this lovely view of clouds. One might say how clouds are lovely because when the sky is clear, we have the best view of the mountain range to the north. But to a child who has passed many boring and lonely days looking at them, the clouds are very close friends. It’s like the clouds want to play with you and the best game you can play with it is charade. It gives you a shape and you have all your imagination to guess what that is and sometimes it tells you stories. But today the clouds aren’t playing any game. They probably know that I have you as my company. The clouds also have their own company. I have already seen two more airplanes in last five minutes. You might be wondering why I’m writing this, why I’m telling what I can see. I have always liked reading what others have written and I admire their ability to express every little detail so you can imagine how they saw the things around them, and how they are in real life. I just want to know how good I’m in expressing how I am.

Unsatisfied...

Have you ever walked on the streets of Kathmandu in the evening? It’s not much of the walking you do as much of pushing and shoving. If you notice closely, you will see all types of people walking all around you. There are young kids and old people, poor and rich, fashionable and not so fashionable. But they all have one thing in common; they don’t observe each other at all. Everybody is busy in their own thoughts. But there is a chain of subtle noticing going on.

Two beautiful women dressed in their best attire are walking, probably 2 a gathering or a party. They are busy gossiping about how they loved necklace they saw a woman wearing on the other side of the road. There is a beggar who is sitting at a side of the road reaching out his hand begging 2 the passersby. He is dirty; even he can’t remember when he had a bath. His clothes are shredded. As the two ladies pass through, the beggar can’t take the eyes off them. The beggar is thinking of his sorry life and imagining being rich. Oh! How lovely would it be 2 have a house, a family and all the happiness? A little girl walking, holding hands of her parents, notices the beggar. The innocent child who knows nothing about the problems of the world points 2 the beggar and asks her mom, “Why is that man sitting on the street and all dirty?” The mother immediately shushes her little child and the parents walk faster. They don’t want 2 give their hard earned money, be however little, 2 a beggar. The parents have their child 2 feed; her future 2 take care of. They can’t waste their money on some hungry beggar. Behind the family is a handsome man noticing the family. He looks smart wearing a shirt and tie. But in his face you can see he is tired. All his life he wanted 2 be successful, working hard every day. Now he on the way 2 be successful. But looking at the family, he wishes he also had a happy family, because deep down he is lonely. He wishes there was a loving wife waiting for him 2 come home and children 2 hug him 2 ease all the pressure of the work. As he reaches up 2 the beggar, he slips a single note in the beggar’s bowl and walks away. Across the street, there is an old man sitting on bench. He is looking at the man in suit and tie. The old man, he doesn’t even remember how many summers he has seen. He is weak and a store house of diseases. Looking at the man, he remembers his youth and all the adventure he has had. With death ever near, he would do anything 2 live his youth one more time, do all the great stuff and mend everything that he regrets. An old woman comes up 2 the bench and sits down next 2 the old man. She is his wife and they smile at each other. On the other side of the road, a beautiful girl in her late teens is waiting for someone. She seems fashionable wearing a beautiful dress. . She is looking at the old couple. She dreams of having a lovely husband and they live happily as the old couple sitting across the street. She and her prince charming want 2 live happily ever after just like in fairy tales.

The chain goes on and on until the road clears at night. Then only silence remains with the exceptions of some vehicles. But there is another new day just around the corner where the passersby look at random people thinking how they wished 2 live another’s life.